Christmas Wishes

If I had the power to produce exactly what I want for Christmas,
I would have all the kings and emperors resign and allow the people to govern themselves.

I would have all the cardinals, archbishops, bishops, priests, and clergy admit that they know nothing about theology, nothing about hell or heaven, nothing about the destiny of the human race, nothing about devils or ghosts, gods or angels.

I would have them tell their "flocks" to think for themselves and do all in their power to increase the sum of human happiness.

I would like to see all editors of newspapers and magazinesagree to print the truth and nothing but the truth, to avoid all slander and misrepresentation, and to let the private affairs of people alone.

I would like to see corporal punishment done away with. Cruelty hardens and degrades; kindness reforms and ennobles.

I would like to see a fair division of profits between capital and labor, so that the toiler could save enough to mingle a little June with the December of his life.

I would like to see the whole world set free - free from injustice - free from superstition.

This will do for this Christmas. Next Christmas, I may want more.

Robert Ingersoll, 1897